Today has been a fairly boring and drawn-out day.

I woke up this morning and took my time getting ready, eventually making my way up to the swing that was beside the old cafeteria for a few minutes of prayer and devotional time. Then Megan called and we talked for a few minutes, which always leaves me feeling anxious to hear from her again later - but such is life at this point. I know she's got work and everything, so I don't take it personally. Besides, she needed to do her Bible study.

After we got off the phone, I found myself being very honest with myself and my desire for her. It's been burning, boiling my blood so to speak, not in the sence of anger, but it's been making me very anxious to get married to her. Our conversations lately have turned to this future that isn't so far away - at our best guess, we could very well be married by this time next year! The way that everything has happened is an amazing journey, and I've also been thinking about moving my plans up a bit so that it will be "okay" for us to talk about everything I'm wanting to talk about. Our parents aren't clueless, but they are blind to how serious we are. Here's a breif list of everything that I can think of that we've talked about:

1) When, where, and who will be invited to the wedding.
2) What to ask for as wedding gifts.
3) Where we would go on our honeymoon. ^.^
4) Where we would live, the prices, ect.
5) College fees, working part-time, expenses.
6) Baby names (Lain Elizabeth, Mathias Yates).
7) Family planning in the minimal sense (i.e. we'll shoot for 5 years).

. . .and I'm sure there's more. The thing that frustrates me more is that our parents, at least on some level, see it as 'puppy love' or something; I'm still confident that they'll support us in some form when we decide to "take the pludge". Stupid marrige slang.

Other things have been on my mind too. The word that I've been studying all day is the greek word for "firstfruits". As I've been studying, I came to the conclusion that I haven't been giving God the firstfruits of everything in my life. Case and point: school. Yes, I've improved, but I shouldn't boast so much about it. I've had tremendous help from a very supportive fiance, but I still haven't gotten it down to where it's routine for me. . . and in typical "Stefan" style, I hate working at things that I have to work at. It saps the energy out of me and I think my recent "napping fits" have been evidence of this. So, I've been fighting the "giving up" thing again and being afraid that nobody'll love me if I'm not doing well. I need to be more vocal in my trials so that I can get help, both from God and from other people.

Megan-min (Yay for japanese petnames!) , the first part of my Hermenutics paper is due on the 27th of this month. ^_^ Please remind me so that I can send you a copy of it for you to proofread when I get it finished, that is,,.

Oh, and another rant: I hate this campus sometimes!
It never ceases to amaze me what sorts of things they feel the need to make people spend money on. I had to pay $30 for a parking permit today. At first, I thought that I could just go up there and everything would be okay, but I was graciously informed that NGC, with everything else that they keep up with, doesn't have the capability to keep up with my previous information (photocopies of drivers licence, registration, proof of insurance), and while I know that this might cause a problem . . .(people changing cars for example), it's still really sort of stupid. Parking should be free. It's Tigerville for goodness sake. I was also under the impression that it was going to be $20, but it turned out to be $30. This doesn't make me happy at all, but oh well! What's done is done.

This weekend is going to be GREAT. ^_^ G-R-E-A-T Great! <3
First off, I've got to get home and switch cars so that I can meet Megan at her house. Then, it's off to Leah's rehersial dinner, and after that, Megan's coming back to my house! Cuddling. Penguins. Meow.

^_^;;

Anywho! Then, we've got all day Saturday to do nothing, and then it's off to Leah's wedding. Megan gets to see me in a suit for the first time.

All this talk of marriage, weddings, and secret things is making me very, very gitty and shy. It's funny how we can't look each other in our faces when we get like this. The more I think of it, the more I think that her face will be the most beautiful shade of crimson red on our wedding day when I lift the veil. . .and that I might just cry when I kiss her because I'll be so happy that I won't know what else to do. I want to cry in her arms like that again, and I hope she'll be able to do the same in mine.

Megan Elizabeth, you are radiant, wonderful, and lovely, and it would give me the greatest joy, if you'd be mine. I will cherish you, forever. I hope you realize one day just how much you've changed my life, and how I'm so thankful to be a part of yours. I love you with all of my heart. ^_~